How to remember
Posted by Rystefn on July 8, 2008
Have you ever loved someone, but did not get along with their family? Most of us have to some degree or another. We go to family gatherings and try to be civil out of respect for our loved one, but we just don’t like that certain relative. It is Jenny’s mother in this case. We have never seen eye to eye on a great many issues, and she certainly never approved of me introducing her daughter into my world. She was a good Catholic girl before we met, the way I hear it. My lifestyle, my friends, my music, my philosophy and belief system, all corrupted her little girl…
Sometimes it takes a tragedy for people to see what they hold in common. Last week, we didn’t get along. Next week, we may not get along again. Today, though, we were the same. United in love and loss, we finally saw in each other what Jenny had seen in us all along. Anyone who loves so much… so fully… Whatever she feared from me, she only ever wished the best for her daughter, and that makes her a good person in my eyes.
I don’t do well at funerals. I hate them with a passion, in point of fact. This one no less so. Her family did what they do in these situations, what they thought best. Tasteful, respectful, solemn and appropriate. I think they would not approve of the service I’m holding tonight, but I think Jenny would. So now I’m off, to remember her the way I want to be remembered: strong, vibrant, joyous. Alive.
We will sing and dance and drink and build a dangerously large bonfire. We will shout and party, and remember her in words and music. We’ll throw such a funeral that the cops will have to break it up. If you don’t hear from me tomorrow, don’t worry – her mother said she’s post my bail.